Suffering Times Three

At a recent session, someone brought up the experience of being in a situation where they were experiencing joy in that moment and, at the same time, experiencing the inherent sadness that this same experience evoked. They seemed to be able to hold both of these emotions simultaneously with a sense of equanimity and acceptance that both could be true and experienced together.

However, I think most of us would try to suppress the feelings of sadness so we could experience only the joy in that moment. This is one of the levels of suffering described by the Buddha. The Buddha explained that there are three levels of suffering: obvious suffering, the suffering of transience or change, and the suffering of ego-conditioning; each one progressively more subtle.

Obvious suffering includes the difficulties in life that we normally consider as suffering: aches and pains, injury and illness, loss of loved ones, and so on. Normally most of us would think of compassion for others only when their suffering is this obvious kind. Note the many advertisements on television show instances of suffering, in an attempt to arouse our compassion for others and elicit a donation to their cause. We don’t tend to generate compassion or generosity for others if they seem well-off and happy.

The second type of suffering is the suffering of transience or change. This is the inevitable sadness, and even misery, inherent in relying for our happiness on circumstances that are changeable. The experience described at the start of this letter is one of those situations. An experience that brings us joy, that we feel really good about, and want to hold onto, has within that experience the nature to change. Something we begin will eventually end. Growth in a new direction means leaving the old safe space. A good change for us may mean sadness or difficulty for others. We actually experience a subtle sense of anxiety or dissatisfaction in every pleasant experience because, on some level, no matter what we do to hold on to or cling to the feeling, we know it will end.

The third level of suffering, the suffering of ego-conditioning, is the basis of the other two levels and the most subtle. It is the suffering inherent in the mind’s constant struggle to establish and maintain a substantial fixed sense of self that doesn’t really exist. This level of suffering is the continual subconscious anxiety that fuels all of our self-centered reactions.

In the book Awakening Through Love, by John Makransky, he states:

The actual source of well-being is the love, compassion, and wisdom that are always available within the nature of our minds.

…Through spiritual practice, love, compassion, and wisdom can become enduring powers that can be relied upon in all circumstances.

Only by resting at ease in the unconditioned essence of our experience can we have the equanimity to deal with all the levels of suffering that arise in our lives.