Three Essentials

Three attitudes and essential practices – turning toward, relaxing into, and savoring peace – give Buddhism its distinctive flavor. The Buddha adapted his teachings to fit the gifts and vulnerabilities of his followers, but most of the practices he taught have these three elements in common.

These practices are closely woven together. Understanding dukkha [suffering, dissatisfaction], abandoning tanha [craving, instinctual tightening], and realizing nirodha [cessation (of craving)] form a foundation for meditation. And they form an attitude toward all of life.

At its core Buddhism is not a practice, set of beliefs, code of conduct, or set of rituals. It has all of these. But in essence Buddhism is an attitude of turning toward whatever life brings our way, relaxing into it, and realizing the pure awareness that is the fundamental basis of all our experience.

There is one caveat: if we’re freaked out and upset, then looking at what’s going on through that disturbed, tense awareness doesn’t help. Whatever we see will be distorted by that tension. We have to turn toward life with a relaxed mind and open heart.

So, if the mind-heart is uptight and we can’t relax it, it’s wise to do whatever we can to help it settle and stabilize. This is where so many practices come from — different ways to stabilize the mind. Techniques range from koans, to breath awareness, to sending kindness, to contemplating the ephemeral nature of our lives and all we experience.

But it’s very important to realize that if all we do is stabilize the mind, that’s not enough. It is essential, but not sufficient by itself. The Burmese meditation master Sayadaw U Tejaniya says:

If the awareness never comes off the object of awareness and turns to awareness itself, your meditation won’t go very far.

If we aren’t aware of the qualities of the mind-heart, we won’t realize the depths that are possible — the depths and heights that are here all the time, just waiting to be savored.

So by all means, do what needs to be done to find a little relaxed, open, stable peace. Then use that wholesome awareness to look into what’s going on in meditation and life outside of meditation.