Beginner’s Mind

I recently listened to an episode of the podcast: Meditation Changes Everything, with Craig Hamilton.

Craig explores the quiet power of approaching meditation — and life — with a “beginner’s mind.” This is a recommendation we uncovered in the last article, Crossing the Threshold. Stepping onto the spiritual path requires us to begin to let go of the patterns of mind that we have acquired over the years. That is symbolized by the ‘beginner’s mind’ which has no preconceived notions of what to expect in a given situation. We become open to all possibilities.

What becomes available when we stop relating to the moment through the lens of what we already know?

As we move through life, we naturally accumulate knowledge and experience. But on the spiritual path, there comes a moment when all of our knowing must be gently set aside—so we can discover a way of being that meets each moment as if for the first time and open ourselves to the mystery that is always unfolding.

• Craig Hamilton

I have experienced the benefit of this approach many times in my own life. Unfortunately for me, and my friends, not all the time. I recommend this approach when others are having difficulty in a relationship that is marred by a grudge, often complemented with anger, resentment, or regret. We are afraid to approach another for reconciliation because we ‘know’ how they will react. The truth is that their response to us is often, sometimes subtly, triggered by our expectations of the outcome. If we can approach the interaction with the neutrality of a beginner’s mind, or even with the expectation of a positive outcome, we may find they respond in a different, more accepting way.

Studies have been conducted with teachers who are told that a new incoming class has a few really bright students and are told who they are. When the students are tested at the end of the year, these students show significantly better performance on tests than the other students. The caveat to these studies is that the ‘bright students’ were really just average students when they entered the class. This shows that the teacher’s expectations can influence their own behavior toward their students and their students can respond in ways that fulfill those expectations. What if we expected all the students in our class to be above average?

Or, what if we are open and available to respond to each student in just the way they needed in that moment. Without any preconceived notion of whether they were gifted or a slow learner. Then perhaps the whole class could benefit from that type of interaction.

So, if you are ‘expecting’ a reaction from someone, and you are aware enough to notice it, then let yourself have the intention to let go of any preconceived idea of how they will respond. Approach the relationship with “beginner’s mind” and be open, attentive, aware, and compassionate. Listening, without knowing ahead of time what you will say in response, may give you the option to respond in more skillful ways that will strengthen the relationship, rather than divide you both further.